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Inspired
By Travis Bray, Prisonersolidarity.org
Sept. 15, 2006
My
name is Travis Bray. I've got the inspiration to become the CEO
of an
independent record company one day. I would be the first artist
on the
label. I'd also like to write books and movies, and I'd like to
speak in
schools and juvenile centers, in order to help some youngstas dodge
the
pitfalls of the hood.
I'm
living in a prison within a prison, having done almost ten years
of
incarceration. One can easily adapt to and consume the prison loser
mentality. This concrete place commits daily assaults on the mind.
That's where
the other prison haunts, as well. I'm a prisoner of my visions and
goals.
I became bigger than the concrete prison the moment I discovered
knowledge
of self. With knowledge of self I discovered my gifts. Some people
live
and die without ever discovering their talents. I believe everyone
has
talent, it just needs to be cultivated. True education is supposed
to bring
out your strengths and talents. I'm doing double time. I sit here
in
disharmony for not being able to express my gifts to the world.
Over the
years, prison will make every attempt to empty out your aspiration.
Some
days I feel like a leader, some days I am weak. But I refuse to
claim the
name of a fool any longer.
The
concrete prison has captured and destroyed countless minds. It tries
with everyone who enters. I miss my music. I'm supposed to be making
history. I thought long and hard about my purpose. In a few years,
this
concrete prison lifestyle will end, but I will still have another
prison to
deal with, from which I must release myself. I must achieve the
goals I set
for myself.
I
look around with my third eye. I only see a handful of real people,
people with whom I feel the connection. We don't talk with our mouths,
we
talk with our actions. I forgive those who have counted me out.
After all,
our lives have been on the line since birth, as young black men
growing up
in the hood. I can get out, and work a job for the rest of my life.
The
problem would be that I'd still be a prisoner. I was put here to
make a
difference, even with all my shortcomings. My mistakes, I don't
hide behind
them. Certain things happen to us that keep our egos in check. We've
got
rags to riches stories, the prince who grows from concrete, slave
turned
king. It's time for another story to be written. I have the right
to
believe in myself, just like so many so-called friends and family
have a
right not to believe in me now.
Children
we should teach, and love them forever. Some adults are unworthy
of friendship. Fantasy is for story books. Fake character is to
be avoided
and real people are to be cherished as truly unique and rare.
Another
thought for another direction - giving back is the most important
lesson I've learned in prison. The lack of caring adults in the
hood, to
help the youth, is sad. I often think about Tookie, the co-founder
of the
Crips, who was murdered by the state of California. The terminator
gave the
order. He was a brother who redeemed himself in prison and transformed
his
gang criminal mentality into that of a true leader and hero. I understand
the puppet media that condemned him. The media is designed to mislead
the
people. The part that got to me was when the broken-down inmates
around
here talked about how he should admit to the crimes. From day one
the
brother claimed his innocence, even if it was going to cost him
is life.
How many people will actually sacrifice their lives for what they
believe
in? Let's all morn and then celebrate a true hero. Tookie wrote
children's
books without the proper resources to do it. He was locked away
in a cell
twenty-three hours a day. I've got first-hand experience with living
in a
cell lockdown twenty-something hours a day. Seeing a fallen hero
hurts,
being betrayed by a hero hurts a hundred times more. When one becomes
aware
one is able to think independently, without the influence of daily
falsehoods. My heart and soul tells me that the creator will give
us what
we ask for. We have to be patient and smart enough to accept and
appreciate
the blessing. The blessing might come through something or someone,
when we
least expect it.
---
Travis Bray, #501567-6c203
Southeast Correctional Center
300 E. Pedro Simmons Drive
Charleston, MO 63837
[Travis
Bray would like to hear from you. You may contact him directly by
writing to the address listed above. The following link offers tips for writing to prisoners:
http://prisonersolidarity.org/TipsForWritingPrisoners.htm
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